Your Own Medicine.

All those blogs I'd written about you. About all the pain and heartbreak I had suffered because of the way you'd treated me.

I know why you did it. It was the only way you could make me let go. And it was hard for me, but in the end, it helped. And now I thank you for that.

You know, most of the people who are unforgiving, really just have to walk a mile in the other person's shoes to understand. 

Turn the tables.

Taste their own medicine.

It's the only way.

And now I realise how you must have felt, seeing as it's now happening to me. But why - of all the people - does it have to be the guy I could turn to when I was upset, and in need of a hug? I didn't ask for this; he didn't ask for this; but it's happened - and there's no going back. Him liking me is wrong on multiple levels, and I tried never repeating what you'd done to me. But now I see, that it's the only way. Making you seem like a complete dickhead as opposed to a gentleman in my eyes had been the pivot point for me. And although I hated you for it, and although it seemed so cruel to shut me out in the cold like that - it worked. And I moved on. 

The fact that I am now doing this to one of my best friends means I'm actually breaking two hearts. It pains me seeing him upset like this, pleading with apologies for me to talk to him. But as far as I can see - it's the only thing I have left.

"I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love,
I did, I did."

But now you're telling me that I don't care about you? That I never did?

We both know that's complete bullshit. And if my Respect and Care post didn't tell you anything, I don't go that way. If you're one of my good friends, then I care about you. Probably more than anyone else. Why do you even think I'm doing all this? For you. All for you. And you'll secretly thank me, and we both know why.

You say you want to go back to how things were, back to when we were still close friends, but that wasn't helping the way things were, or what they were becoming. 

I'm sorry. It never meant to get this far. But you pushed it to here. My limits closed up, my stress levels became too much, and so here we are, and here we'll stay.

For now.

Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmmm that it's all for the best?
Well of course it is. ♥