Open Curtain.

You're sitting side-stage, listening to the overture. 

With your make-up done, and your costume and microphone on, there is nothing you can do except think.

Everyone can see how nervous you are due to your pale face, but only you can feel the accelerated heart-rate throughout your body and that familiar twitch in your right index finger.

The other principle roles come over every now and then, giving you a sympathetic look for your stress and a "break-a-leg" hug for good luck, but no one offers any words of confidence as the mics are on, and the theatre is packed.

Why is it, when all this is happening, do you only think of the negatives? The "what-ifs"?
What if I forget my lines?

What if I crack on that high note?

What if my costume fails on stage?

What if everything goes horribly wrong?

And sure, sometimes you tell yourself something positive, like "You'll be fine Dannie. Nothing will go wrong."
But who really believes that when it comes from themselves?

"A sympathetic look for your stress and a 'break-a-leg' hug for good luck."

When the curtain opens on opening night, no one knows what to expect. Sure you've rehearsed four months for this moment, but when it comes down to crunch time, you suddenly realise you never really properly looked at that one bitchy line. Or you never learnt that one step of movement that had always kept you eight counts behind everyone else.

These simple worries lead you to that massive break down, and remind you off all the work you put in for these few performances. All that time and effort that will have been used up in the space of one short week. 

Was it all worth it? The only way to know for sure, is after you've finished the end line on that four minute solo. There is sweat pouring down your face, stage lights blinding your vision, and the uncomfortable feel of the carpet-like costume scratching against your skin. But none of this matters when you hear that audience's applause, and that smile creeps onto your face, and your thinking "that was fun, let's do it again."