When someone you love dies, it feels like the world is crashing down.
Nothing someone says to you can cheer you up; and everything people do brings you down.
You realise that there's nothing you can do to bring that person back, and you find yourself snapping at people who tell you that "they understand how you feel" when in reality, no one does but yourself.
For ages you go through the seven stages of grief: shock; denial; bargaining; guilt; anger; depression; then finally, acceptance and hope."No matter how much you want the world to stop, it keeps turning."
A few people go to therapy. A few dedicate the next couple of months to that person, from visiting the grave weekly to making collages full of that dead friend's face - to remember the good times - you'll tell yourself. But the real reason is so that you can't stand the thought of forgetting how that person used to look.
The remaining people just trudge on through life, knowing that that space inside them will be empty forever, but eventually put to the side.
Then comes the sad truth that we all eventually realise. No matter how much you want the world to stop, it keeps turning. There's still letters in the mail; a pet that needs to be fed; a dishwasher that still doesn't work; homework that needs to be completed. It's just the sad sad truth when you feel like your life is like an island in an ocean of diarrhea.

ive never read this blog before but im thinking it hasn't been noticed enough.
ReplyDeletei am making this post sort of about me
but the way you describe death hear sort of makes the way ive felt it past times seem that much more okay.
the simple but true form in which you have explained the tangled emotion which is grief is amazing.
and yes although i said ealier its simple it does it justice.
"Then comes the sad truth that we all eventually realise. No matter how much you want the world to stop, it keeps turning."
that line just there.
that one line relates to anyone who has ever lost anyone.
and dannie you've explained this exquisitly
btw i suggest a book called a year of magical thinking its about a woman dealing with grief.
shes a smart writer like you.
thankyou :):)
ReplyDeletei wrote this for a friend of mine who is more angella's friend than mine, and her best friend had just died of a drug overdose.
she ended up reading this blog, and commenting on it back in the old myspace days.
and i was happy to secretly let her know that i was there :)